I’m frustrated, as I have been lately. I’m frustrated because this is the third day in a row I’ve sat down with a computer to write and I haven’t gotten anything done. I’m frustrated because I’m in pain; acute, constant, physical pain. I am particularly frustrated because my pain has become an excuse for me to sit around and do nothing and blame my troubles on the universe. I am so very, very frustrated because I am lazy and selfish and I didn’t even realize until a few hours ago that I am the only one to blame.
I love writing. I’ve been meaning to work on my writing for a while. Write a story, get published. Y’know, the writers dream. The last story I wrote was just over a year ago for my diplomas in school, and I don’t even know if I count that. I realized that I lack the discipline, the self-motivation to even do something which I love to do. I guess that should have been my first sign somethings wrong.
What I’m getting at is, I can’t justify how I’m living anymore. I could justify not exercising. I don’t even like exercise. I could justify not giving up junk food. I like junk food. I could justify eating meats when I knew that the animals were being held in cruel environments. I enjoy eating meat. I could even justify not giving up certain food or clothing items when I knew that they were being produced in a harmful, unsustainable fashion. I could justify it, but that’s the moment I became a hypocrite.
At some point in my justifications and excuses, I crossed the line from doing what I liked to being lazy and apathetic. And that needs to change, and in order to change it I’m going to need to make some pretty big changes to my life. I wanted to post this here so that some day I can either look back and say to myself ‘I did exactly what I said I would’, or I’ll look back and be disappointed in myself.
So, what am I changing? I’m going partial-vegan. Not only do the practices in the meat industry make my stomach churn, red meat and dairy doesn’t even sit well in my stomach. I always feel ill after. So I’m going on a vegan diet, with the exception of fish, poultry, and eggs. Those exceptions being because I need a reliable source of protein to not die. However, as long as it’s in my power, I’ll make an effort to make sure those items came from sustainable farming methods.
I’m also cutting processed foods out of my diet as much as possible. I’m poor, I don’t think I’ll be able to do it entirely, but I’m cutting out things like cheetos and shit that I know is full of stuff that is going to give me cancer.
I’m going to follow a regular sleep schedule. I’ve been doing that for less than a week now, and I’ve already noticed improvements to how I feel. So I’m going to keep that up.
I’m going to exercise. Daily. At the same time every day. And I’m probably going to hate it, but I’ll do it.
I’m going to meditate, also daily. I’ll start off by doing it for small periods of time, but I’ll increase it as days pass.
I’m going to write. This will be my part-time job until I get a job. I’ll write five days a week and I won’t let my fear of writing poorly get in the way. I will fill a minimum word count and a minimum time count per-day.
I am going to limit my access to the internet. Instead of allowing myself unlimited time to distract myself with tumblr, reddit, and facebook, I am going to give myself a finite amount of time to spend on the computer each day. This will give me time to do things not listed here, like chores, painting, drawing, or photography.
Finally, I am going to adhere to a schedule. I will exercise, meditate, and write and the same time each day, so that I can have structure in my life. I’ll allow myself flexibility, because I know that life is full of surprises and I may not be able to do some things at the same time some days. But as long as it’s within my power, I’ll adhere to that schedule.
This will be temporary. It will start in a few weeks, and it will end at the end of summer. Then, depending on how I feel at that point, I may choose to discontinue entirely, or continue with certain elements of it.
I’m going to do these things, because if I can’t give up the things that control me that I don’t enjoy, and if I can’t make myself do the things I do enjoy, why do I bother staying alive?
Wish me luck!
I’ll send one winner:
- a brand new pocket-size, ruled Moleskine notebook
- a Cobalt Blue Letraset permanent twin-tip Promarker
And a different winner:
- the Easy Classics - Hans Christian Andersen - The Ugly Duckling and Other Fairy Tales english book.
- Please don’t enter the giveaway if you don’t intend to enjoy either of those items. I intend to help out people who like to write/do art and whom loves to read in english and perhaps is not even an english native person.
- Reblog to enter. If you haven’t been following me before and you want a chance, then please click on the follow button, because this is basically a gift for my lovely followers.
- Winner will be decided by a random number raffle.
- You can reblog this as many times as you’d like, but if you are a give-away only blog, I will choose someone else.
I’ll ship anywhere in the world, but you need to be comfortable with giving me your address! Also, please make sure you have your askbox open or somewhere I can contact you if you win.
I will choose a winner on: 22nd, October, 2012
Thank you for making my tumblr experience enjoyable! :)
WOWIE IT’S CELESTIALALLEGORIST’S “WHY ARE THERE SO MANY OF YOU GUYS” GIVEAWAY!
What are you even doing Sarah
- There are a lot of you guys
- and I like to make plushies
- so I’m gonna give you presents
Cut to the chase what sort of radloot am I gonna score here
- »FIRST PLACE«: One scalemate and two squiddles (color of your choice)
- »SECOND PLACE«: One scalemate or two squiddles (color of your choice)
- »THIRD PLACE«: One squiddle (color of your choice)Tell me more about these fabulous prizes
- They will all be 100% handmade by me with ~*~love and care~*~
- Both the scalemates and the squiddles will be made out of fleece
- The squiddles will have magnets in the bottom so they’ll tangle together because that’s just so much fun oh man
- Neither the squiddles nor the scalemates will have squeakers in them I am a poor college kid
- When I say color of you choice, I mean any color within reason. Anything that I can easily find fleece in at a normal fabric store.Sweet okay wow that sounds amazing and generous now what are the rules
- You do not have to be following me and all you will gain from following me is my eternal love and gratitude
- Reblog as much as you like, just be respectful of your followers
- Tag all your reblogs with “giveaway”. I will be checking.
- Likes don’t count
- No side blogs/giveaway blogs/any of that malarkey
- I will contact the winners via ask box so KEEP THEM SUCKERS OPEN
- I’m in college and generally a little busy which means it’ll take me a little bit to actually get these suckers put together, but I’ll try and get them made and sent out ASAP
- If you live the US, I’ll pay for shipping. If you live outside of the US, we’ll talk.
- GIVEAWAY ENDS ON OCTOBER 31 (HALLOWEEN) (2SPOOKY) AT 10 PM PSTGOOD LUCK EVERYONE!
reblogging for the day crowd
On November 6, four states will be voting for or against allowing marriage equality in their state.
If you are 18 or older, live in either Maryland, Maine, Minnesota, or Washington State, and support marriage equality, please do your part by registering to vote and voting in favor of equal rights.
If you are underage and/or you do not live in these states, please reblog this so that people can be informed.
this gif is a perfect representation of done
THAT WAS AN ENTIRE FUCKING HAM…
WHO BRINGS AN ENTIRE HAM TO SCHOOL AND WASTES IT BY THROWING AT A KID?
DINKLEBURG THATS WHO